Beerfest

Necessary Patriotic Viewing for this Independence Day

People might forget how low it was to be an American in 2006.  Iraq and Afghanistan were raging out of control.  The US looked incompetent and overwhelmed and waswere alienating large parts of the World United States.  Thomas Ricks’ book Fiasco from that summer was an apt articulation of the Zeitgesit.   

I feel that same way now.  The US is stuck in two wars (and itching for a third - C’Mon on down China), a buffoon is President, and we are on the verge of economic turmoil.  

At least during the psychological malaise of summer 2006 Beerfest was released.  It was the best escape for a beleaguered and patriotic American. The Broken Lizard bros made a movie that showed American triumph on the world stage against, you guessed it, ze Germans.  

And it's hilarious as hell.  

Very quotable.  

And it holds up.    

Stereotypical villains aside, we have a great story that matches the hero's journey.  It’s a story of two brothers who are humiliated on the world stage at an Illuminati-style competition, Beerfest, in Munich by Bavarian Buttholes (clip from YouTube).  They vow to reclaim their honor as well as their family’s honor.   Our heroes enlist others a diverse skillset (but they do enlist a Jew, Muslim, and Indian-American so there is the superficial diversity as well), and their subsequent training bonds them.  

They face difficulty and are nearly broken apart by the death of teammate Landfill and a loss of a secret Beer Recipe so good you want its dick in you. They are ready to forgo the journey, but instead drive forward.  Each member articulates their fears, and instead of internalizing these emotions they use their teamwork, training, and  a shared goal to overcome their failings.  They exhibit an American stubbornness to succeed even if they are viewed as uncouth along the way.    

In the ultimate competition they are representing the colors, and it is not in a jingoistic manner.  You are rooting for the bros in red, white, and blue not because they are there to conquer but to honor family and country.   

Through wit, strength, and determination they overcome the seemingly unbeatable Germans, atone for their past failings, and bring the boon “Ze Greatest Beer in all Ze World!”) back to America.  

Rocky IV, eat your heart out.  The American Drinking Team comes back from 0-3 on the road.  This was unheard of in sports, and this was before the Red Sox did it to the Yankees.   

It sucks “patriot” is such a beleaguered term nowadays and that the only expression of pride can be expressed is towards violent Jacobbins intent on destroying our country.  Find joy and inspiration from this classic.  Remember if Barry Badrinath can overcome a ping pong paddle up the ass, you too can overcome anything.  Treat yourself to one of the best Independence Day films of all time: Beerfest.

So warm up a sausage, Bavarian style.  Eat that tomato, asshole.  And remember, when your loved ones tell you to slow down at your 4th of July Party, remember our cheeky forebears and start chanting: “We’re not that drunk!” Prost!